As part of refreshing my Life Plan at the end of last year, I took the Enneagram Personality test, which suggested I am a Type 5 with a 6 Wing. The Enneagram is a personality categorising methodology of unknown (but ancient, possibly some Catholic mystic) provenance which was brought to the US by G.I. Gurdjieff and and eventually to pop culture by the likes of Richard Rohr. I owe my introduction to it to Ian Morgan Cron and his various appearances on podcasts I listen to regularly, as part of his book tour. More information is available here. With the benefit of time on my hand, I decided it would be a good time to re-read the book (The Road Back To You) and reflect on what I’ve learned about myself in the process.

The Enneagram 5 is part of the head triad (along with

Summary of Enneagram history and notes

Type 5 characteristics:

  • living in my head, can take care of myself, awkward around people

  • willing to answer a few personal questions, require time alone (introverted?)

  • thoughts trump feelings?

  • need to process things internally

  • observe rather than participate

  • focused interactions

  • listener,

  • careful with time and energy

  • felt invisible as a child, choose to be as an adult

  • wants knowledge and information

  • introverted and analytical

Healthy 5s

  • balance participation and observations

  • neutral

  • depth in knowledge in multiple domains

Average

  • scarcity - hoard time, space, affection

  • thinking replaces feeling (inTj)

  • rely on self rather than faith

Poor

  • don’t depend on anyone

  • defensive focused on privacy

  • stay seprate from family and other gatherings

5’s deadly sins

  • see the world as intrusive and overwhelming/ draining

  • demand outpaces supply of energy

  • deadky sin = avarice: a desire to retain , clench and protect what they already have

  • hoard to ensure self sufficient existence

  • withold resources, time, information, space, solitude

  • excessive desire for acquiring knlwedge and understanding of how things works

  • look to knowledge to provide what others find from relationships - love, comfort, support

  • 5’s are minimalists: aim to keep life simple and

can be isolated in life, skimp on love and affection particularly with those around them.

  • appear to be loners, emotiolnally distance, intellectually arogant, aloof.

  • can enjoy being with other intellctually curious people

benefit is they can be objective and neutral.

collect knowledge, information provides validation for 5’s, keen to not seem incapable, inept or unknowledgable.

computers and internet help to limit interactions with others

can compartmentalise well between work, family etc

5’s like to have control over their emotions, have emotions and let them go

fancy themselves as rational thinkers

5’s as children

  • possibly had childhood with little affection?

  • intrusive parents, no deep meaningful attraction

  • as kids retreated to the delights of their minds and work out feelings out of sight.

  • voracious readers, collectors of things, good around coding and computers,

  • usually make good grades, appear more serious than they are but deep down are tender and compassionate

  • fear vulnerability? - i feel shook!!!

In relationships

  • can be misunderstood

  • don’t want to be sucked into your emotional dramas

  • expect you to take responsibility for your emotions

  • have to be independent and have me time.

  • need time for privacy and solitude

  • keep cards close to check, rarely initiate social interaction

  • deal with people on a need to know basis

  • unlikely to share emotions like love etc

  • Positives

    • stay calm

    • low maintenance

    • can share your secrets and keep them under the seal of the confessional

    • understand confidentiality

  • Required to

    • Give up security of independence and privacy

    • identify and express feelings

    • Be the guardian of your solitude - Rainer maria Rilke

At work

  • valued for pioneering, analytical mind eg gates, hawkins, bonhoeffer etc

  • innovators and thinkers

  • typical careers eg engineers, programmers,

  • emergency room doctors,

  • artists, creators, due t powers of observation

  • Need predictability so they can plan and apportion resources

  • Prefer to be given a project and autonomy to work on it to completion withour inteference

  • real reward is more autonomy and independence.

  • not big fans of group decisions, can make speeches as long as they can prepare.

Wings

  • Between passionate 4’s and loyal 6’s

  • 5w4 - more creative, emphatetic and self absorbed, sensitive. Independent, eccentric, prefer to process by self not in a group. More likely to experience melancholy, can communicate feelings to people they love

  • 5w6 - more sceptical, social & loyal, live more in their mind, will question authority, more relational, and more aware of their own fear, socially awkward,

stress & security

  • stress = unhealthy 7: focus on own needs, frivolous, distracted, still live in head but unable to think through clutter

  • security = healthy  8: infinitelymore spontaneous and outspoken,

spiritual

  • naturally contemplative, attracted to simplicity

  • inner calm and detachment

  • can risk disconnection from spiritual life and feeling,

  • need to learn pattern of detaching in order to enagage

  • need to be able to connect to emotions in real time

  • can teach others

  • recognise when action is driven by fear - become more self aware.

  • embarce abundance

  • learn to trust more, become comfortable with dependence/ interdependence

  • 10 paths

    • allow feeling to arise naturally,

    • recognise when hoarding affection, etc

    • try to feel others emotions in the moment

    • try sharing more of life with others

    • venture out of comfort zone, share with others

    • remember you don’t have to have the answers for everything

    • call a friend and offer to hang out -

    • allow yourself to experince luxury

    • take up yoga, or other thing that will connect you with your body

    • even when unsure jump into a conversatoin rather than withdrawing.